Speak to me of love!

This charming movie brought language and love togther!
 An international survey of more than 5,000 men and women, including 1,300 Americans, overwhelming found those who can speak a foreign language are considered to be more attractive.
 
According to the survey, 79 percent find a bilingual person more attractive, while 77 percent rate those who can speak a foreign tongue as more intelligent.
 
When it comes to love, French is considered the sexist language, chosen by 41 percent. Then Italian is chosen by 16 percent, with Spanish a close third, at 15 percent. English was chosen by 10 percent of those surveyed.
 
The survey was commissioned by Rocket Languages, an online language learning company.
 
 
 
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Celebrate romance

Gracey Hitchcock
Darlings, I know that not everyone loves Valentine’s Day. Some dismiss it was commercial and corny. It may well be, as bestselling author Jackie Collins recently told me, the worst night of the year to dine out.  And for many who have not yet found love it may seem cruel.
But darlings, I am romantic. I cannot resist a celebration of love. So, if it appeals to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your lover or friends. Celebrate love in all its forms sweetly, softly, jovially, hotly or all of the above.
 
 
Until next week, please sign-up if you haven’t already; email your info to domore@dolcedolce.comDolceDolceis free. And please forward us to all your friends. And please give us your comments by emailing us at the same address. We want to know what you think. Please LIKE us on FACEBOOK http://www.facebook.com/pages/dolcedolcecom/215363998481866 Look for our logo! Let’s start the conversation!
 Gracey Hitchcock
 
 
 
 
Gracey Hitchcock
Editor
Photo by: www.yanka.ca
© DolceDolce® 2012
All DolceDolce content is copyright
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A story of hope and redemption

The Midwife of Hope River by Patricia Harmon is a gripping tale of life, death, love, and redemption, set in the hard-scrabble hills of West Virginia during the great depression in the 1930s.
 
Patience Murphy is a woman in hiding.  She provides the only reliable medical care available to most pregnant women in her isolated rural community. She and her controversial black helper and roommate struggle to keep mothers and infants alive through difficult deliveries.
 
Haron, a real life career midwife, does a beautiful job describing the privations and prejudices of the period. It is easy to forget that there was a time when ordinary Americans had no safety net and often lived in fear of being homeless, hungry, and lost due to simple twists of fate.
 
In The Midwife of Hope River, Patience finds a second chance at love and life after many misfortunes and disappointments. This is a story with deep resonance in a time when so many people are struggling.
 
Harmon’s well-drawn characters will linger in your mind and heart long after you turn the last page. The Midwife of Hope River is a universal tale of hope, redemption, and second chances that will warm your heart.
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Clueless

Perfect on Paper by Janet Gross is modern love story and mystery that will have many single women will relate to. Dana Mayo is a neurotic New Yorker. She also a crossword addict, snappy dresser, good friend and talented artist. But, when it comes to love, she is clueless and stuck in the past. She has been nursing a crush for years on her first love, a married man. She even tracks down his daughter and vomits on her in a fit of nerves. She makes Carrie Bradshaw at her most awkward look like Jackie Kennedy.
 
So Dana decided to clean up love life. She meets Hank, a sexy contractor, but he has a mysterious life and she is not sure he is on the up and up. She also meets Billy, a crossword genius who is too young for her but too sexy to resist.
 
Gross has managed to capture the pathos of many modern women who can think and obsess themselves out of happiness. Perfect on Paper will amuse, confound and keep romantics in the edge of their seat until the last page.
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In the moment!

We love a smart phone to, but to attract love or make a good impression --put down the gadget!Glamour magazine recently asked a hundred men what would turn them off on a first date. The answer may surprise you. Overwhelming, the biggest turn-off was a woman who repeatedly checked her phone for texts and messages.  

I have heard all the excuses that people make about the pressure of work today and needing to be in touch all the time. I don’t buy it.
 
A lot of the time people spend on their gadgets is recreational or “desperational.” They endlessly update their facebook page, look at status updates of “friends,” and text and trawl as they look for the next “big thing.” These people are so insecure, hungry, and desperate that they can’t look away from their phones for fear of missing “the” text that will change their lives.
 
This is not an age issue either. One of my friends was afraid to object when   girlfriends texted during dinners together; she thought she would look “old” if she complained. Nonsense! I have popular socially-connected friends in their 20s who can put down their phones to enjoy a meal, performance, or a conversation. I also know socially maladjusted people of all ages who just can’t seem to stay in the moment as they click and tap through any engagement.
 
For those who are looking for love and waiting for Mr. Right, being text-dependant could even be the kiss of death. If a man they are interested in texts them, are they going to answer him right away? Do they really want to be that available?
 
Let’s face it, texting is one of the worst things to happen to the dating game. And, the older you are the deadlier it can be. Ask any relationship expert — male or female — and they will tell you the same thing. If a man is really interested in you, he’ll call you and he will ask you out. Men may be shy, lazy, or unsophisticated, but if they meet a woman they want, they usually find a way to ask her out. Don’t let your well-meaning friends tell you differently. But, sitting by your phone or texting endlessly is not the way to get a man to fall for you.
 
Darlings, be in the moment! Connect with people. Really listen when they talk; you might learn something — or even have a good time. Don’t be guilty of looking over anyone’s shoulders, or gazing down at your phone for messages while you are chatting. People notice you are distracted. I do and it bores me. I avoid hustlers. I can spot anyone who only wants to connect for what I can do for them. I avoid them like the plague. I know my friends feel the same way. Networking with the like-minded can be fabulous, but learn to enjoy conversation for its own sake, or your life will be very limited.
 
Get interested in things. Read, see films, follow politics, or get a hobby. Get off the phone and offline. Get out and do something. Interested people are interesting.
 
Do you want to meet someone new and maybe fall in love? Let’s assume you already look fabulous, but are still having trouble connecting. Ask yourself:
 
When was the last time you learned something new – for fun? Do you challenge yourself? Do you try new things and get out your own routine? If not, you may need a change.
 
When you dine with friends, do you keep your phone at hand so you can scan for non-essential texts and messages? Well, darlings, I have already told you what a major turn-off that is to everyone.
 
Ask yourself, are you attracted the guy who is always looking over your shoulder or the one who really focuses and pays attention. What is more compelling? A confident man surrounded by friends and colleagues, or a guy who is in the moment.
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Save as draft

Save as Draft by Cavanaugh Lee is an amusing look at modern communication and its affects on romance. The unusual novel, set in Atlanta, follows the love life of young lawyer Izabel Chin. The novel is written is series of emails, texts, and other cyber-communications. It points out the humour and pitfalls of modern dating, as Izabell juggles suitors, romance, and disappointment with a busy work life. 

The author is a former actress/waitress — she says “wactress.” She is now a busy Southern lawyer and federal prosecutor. She delved into her own life and her "save as draft” file to write this book. It’s a page-turner and a warning to anyone who needs to turn off their gadgets and come out and play.

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Everyone deserves love

Patti Stanger: Everyone deserves loveThe Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger says “everyone deserves love”. I love Patti. She gives good advice. But darlings, if you are not careful, you may never get what you deserve. If you are looking for love you have to get out there and look. You can’t stay at home and wish for it . But, you can’t be needy and desperate either.  

Darlings, if you are happy in a relationship, good for you. Go help a single friend –who is looking – to meet someone nice. Never sell yourself short. Be sweet, open, and appealing. But also be a lady who is confident and secure in your own worth. If your mother didn’t tell you, never call boys!
 

If you are in Atlanta this week you may be beautifully uplifted at the “First Annual Battle of The Salons” sponsored by The Nina J. Spicer Foundation Inc., bringing awareness to the community about the causes and prevention of cancer. Nina was a model, dancer and a beauty show coordinator. She received the news of her fate with liver and lung cancer one year before she passed away at 33 years old.

 

http://www.ninajspicerfoundationinc.com/events.html

 
Until next week, please sign-up if you haven’t already – DolceDolceis free. And please forward us to all your friends. And please give us your comments by clicking the “comment” link at the end of each item. We want to know what you think. Let’s start the conversation!
 
 
 
 
Gracey Hitchcock
Editor
Photo by: www.yanka.ca
 
© DolceDolce® 2010
All DolceDolce content is copyright

 

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“Facebook is where you can find everyone you didn’t sleep with…

Mercy's star Taylor Schilling

I decided to investigate after hearing a provocative teaser from NBC’s new show Mercy. One of the lead characters says “Facebook is where you can find everyone you didn’t get to sleep with in high school and college.”
 
The writers of that show have a whole different perspective on Facebook than the one I’m privy to, but I could see where they were coming from. Tales of unrequited or long-lost first love is nothing new. My own sister reunited with her high school boyfriend. They have two children now. She never moved far from our home town, nor did he. What Facebook does is make every place accessible. And there is the potential for havoc for those hitting a rough patch in their current relationships. Also there are those who never get over their first loves, and others who hold an overly romantic view of the past.
 
According to a recent article in the www.telegraph.co.uk, Mark Keenan, Managing Director of Divorce-Online said: "I had heard from my staff that there were a lot of people saying they had found out things about their partners on Facebook and I decided to see how prevalent it was. I was really surprised to see 20 per cent of all the petitions containing references to Facebook.” According to some experts, the stats say women who cheat and are caught usually are divorced by angry husbands. Men who cheat are often forgiven and suffer much less from their Internet dalliance.
 
And it isn’t just married couples who are affected by Facebook’s potential for relationship havoc. Social psychologists from theUniversity of Guelph in Canada questioned a group of college students about the effect of Facebook on their romantic relationships. Their preliminary findings, described in the journal CyberPsychology & Behavior, suggest that Facebook use may be fueling jealousy and other unhealthy behavior.

Take away the extremely public nature of Facebook and its ability to broadcast one’s indiscretions and the only question remaining is — is any of this new? I don’t think so.
 
Darlings, over the years I have known crazy jealous people; men and women. They were born insecure and jealous and they will die that way. Nothing seems to squelch their suspicions. They see plots and poachers everywhere. Don’t linger near their spouse; even if you are eight months pregnant, they’ll suspect you of flirting. It’s craziness of a special kind, I suspect those who stay married to them enjoy the sick attention. I give these people a wide berth.
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Facebook is tailor-made for players. They can keep several women on a string, without even leaving home. These guys love the game. They enjoy feeding the fires of jealousy. Anyone who loves a cheater is bound to be miserable or crazy or both. 
 
Granted, the potential for crazy-making on Facebook is boundless with all the updates and commentary from friends. But is it any different than the endless chatter of high school or college dorms, if you are vulnerable to that sort of insanity? Just as with the 24-hour news cycle of today, or the endless stream of cheap celebrity gossip — you can switch it off at will. 
 
After over 25 years of marriage, I can offer a few suggestions on how to survive Facebook and a few other relationship challenges. Accept that a cheater is a cheater and will never change. If you love one, get over it, or accept being miserable. It sounds harsh, but in the long run you will save your self a world of pain.
 
Foolish behavior can lead to foolish choices by otherwise sensible people. That’s why smart, well-intentioned people avoid sticky-icky situations. Any situation fueled by too much alcohol will probably result in trouble, so avoid them.
 
Flirting is natural and fun, but if it happens too often or gets too edgy, stop it if your not free to follow-up on it. 
 
Anyone who guards their email and cell phone is a bad relationship bet; normal people do not have secrets. If something feels wrong, it probably is. If you feel like you‘re dating a stalker, you have a problem. Get away from them and get help. If you feel like someone is cheating, and you are not a jealous maniac, you may be right.  
 
None of this advice is new. Too few people trust their instincts when it comes to starting new relationships or maintaining old ones.   I don’t think Facebook is the culprit when things go baldy between two people. 
 
Some experts say Facebook is addictive and causes rage, as family members feel tuned out. Perhaps, but is it any different than being ignored by a workaholic, alcoholic or anyone who chooses to ignore you for substance abuse? I don’t get it, we are all allowed hobbies, but I have never understood how computer addiction could compete with real live humans.
 
Elena " a popular girl" showed up on TV-land's Class Reunion"to  find a man", Facebook could  have saved her time and travel. Facebook may help you find everyone you didn’t get to sleep with in high school and college, if that’s your thing. It also makes reconnecting with old friends a snap. For those of us who have moved many times this is a boon. It’s also fabulous tool for keeping up with new friends instantly in a new city. And if you are single and looking, who is to say the devil you know is not better and safer than the one you might you find on an online dating site? Why not date an old friend from the past?
 
No darlings, Facebook doesn’t ruin relationships, bad choices do. Please send you r coments to domore@dolcedolce.com
 

 

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